A story i had to tell....

I got into a relationship about 14months ago when I met this girl Kimberly Mak Tsin Tib, we soon found ourselves in a relationship. But right off the bat her past came to haunt us, one of her recent ex-boyfriends came to confront her.

He stormed into the house where we were together and started saying all kinds of things about their and her past, im not sure how much of it was true as he was saying she had been sleeping around with a lot of guys and that her nature would be to leave me for another guy when she gets to UK.

but I stood by and protected her when he started to get violent, forcing her to kiss him. I called the cops when he just refused to go away. He did show up repeatedly for a while, obviously very upset of how their relationship ended. Finally after some time he ceased to bother us and we could get on with our lives.

We got on quite well with ourselves, enjoying time together and with our families going on trips etc.. we were happy with where we were, or so I thought. Then came the time for her to leave for the UK, many times had she just wanted to end our relationship. To me that appeared as just taking the easy way out, I tried to preserve what was important to me and so I thought we should try to maintain our relationship.

6 months went by and it was time for her to fly off, another 6months went by when she was there and we had our ups and downs. We planned a trip for me to go over there and we would travel around UK together a month from now in the summers before I transfer there to complete my studies a few months later.

We started to argue more as she said I was being such a negative person showing my unhappiness towards the distance in between us and it was affecting her. Each time we talked things through and I asked her to just always be honest with me if there is another party involved so at least I know im not wasting my time or hers for that matter. But she said no, there was nobody else.

I knew that she was getting close with one of her housemates so I asked about him and she would answer " he is just like my bro, we just have fun together, there is no way we would have a relationship, besides i got u!"

Recently she went to his hometown, spending time together with him and his family. After that things got tense between us, she felt affected by my negativity and suggest that we ‘put the relationship on hold’, at that point I questioned her again about that guy and she answered the same as before. So after talking we decided to take things slowly.

But something seemed very wrong and so I did something I am not proud of. It wasn’t too difficult to guess her skype password and there I found the truth.

When I confronted her, she confessed and said it has been going on for a while, even before she followed him back to his hometown. She said that I made her sad and he was there when there was nobody else to lean on. She said her feelings for him were more than for me.

She said she still loves me and wants to try and work things out,but when I asked if she is in a relationship with him, she said yes.

She said "it doesn’t matter because at the end of the day it is me she will come back to, because he was leaving for France".

It was only a few nights earlier we confirmed the hostel we were going to stay in when I came to visit her there, only later I found out that she already made plans to go back to his hometown first and then from there come meet me when I arrive in London.

At this point I was quite speechless. I asked her to choose between me or him, she chose me and said she would end things with him.

Just an hour later after talking to a ‘friend’ she changed her mind, thus ending our relationship. She ended with " i spoke to Gell and i think its important tht im happy in a relationship,and im not happy with u.so i had to do this sooner or later.this is good for both of us.and at the end of the day. ‘your just a boy and I have a future ahead’."

Fair enough but is that justification to cheat on me.

Do you not see your own disgust? You are the vile essence that has transformed me into a being so consumed by hate, capable of writing this.

You have tainted the person that was once me.

~Sempurna~

Woke up to this song playing on my play list.
Immediately the memories and the past feelings came flashing back.Imagine ur standing right in front of a railway crossing,very close to the barrier/gate with the train passing by right in front of you and the each passenger window carries an imagine a memory from the time.
Flashing by.
Memories of when you were in need of someone,and i was there.

It was all that matters to you and i gave it my all

Hold on,Don't stray,

Tell you why:I say its infinitely true.

Kau begitu sempurna
Dimataku kau begitu indah
Kau membuat diriku akan slalu memujimu

Disetiap langkahku
Kukan slalu memikirkan dirimu
Tak bisa kubayangkan hidupku tanpa cintamu

Janganlah kau tinggalkan diriku
Takkan mampu menghadapi semua
Hanya bersamamu ku akan bisa

[Reff:]
Kau adalah darahku
Kau adalah jantungku
Kau adalah hidupku
Lengkapi diriku
Oh sayangku, kau begitu
Sempurna... Sempurna...

Kau genggam tanganku
Saat diriku lemah dan terjatuh
Kau bisikkan kata dan hapus semua sesalku

Janganlah kau tinggalkan diriku
Takkan mampu menghadapi semua
Hanya bersamamu ku akan bisa

[Reff:]
Kau adalah darahku
Kau adalah jantungku
Kau adalah hidupku
Lengkapi diriku
Oh sayangku, kau begitu
Sempurna... Sempurna...

~Butterfly~

My name is Julian Ee, I'm a student at University of Nottingham Malaysia. Its just a place somewhere in the world, maybe it might be like your world. maybe if you look closely you might see someone that's like you,
someone that looks up to the night sky in search of stars every night, in my case-looking out for this butterfly every now and then.
Every night before i say goodnight,i look up and tell myself,
'i'l do anything to have a day like that'.
Hovering around in the sun's sweet ray, you would awaken to the flickering of its wings. Beautiful and gracefull yet enchanting
... it leads you to the sunny side of life,
leads you to the Sunshine that you always knew..
I just want to hold on to it,
Its all i need.

~Rain~

~Michael Buble -Lost~

Its raining again,
been raining every hour of the day for the past 3 weeks,

sound of the raindrops seem to never stop here,
followed by the cold breeze that never seems to go away,
Drip... Drip... Drip... Drop

~In Time~

In time, we will wake up to the sunshine together.
Of sunrise and sunsets.
In time, we shall wake up to the same melody.
Of you opening those sleepy eyes.
Thats sunshine to me.

Laptop failed on me

Technology has failed me, laptop restarts and restarts till my work is all gone.
Tons of web tabs with precious info gone.
All back to square 1.
Off to bed~ bad day.













Gonna get a new laptop.
Its green and its cool.
Could sustain the abuse you could do to it.
The green goblin.
Its a hit amongst the kids.
Adult contents filtered out.

~Happy Kimmyberry~

Random pics from happy times that she would have.. When shes the Pika, when shes in her normal mood, when shes Miss Little Sunshine.

"Its too loud!"


"Hmnnn........."


"Byeeeeee!"


Sweetness of the Sunshine


"Bluek!!!!"


"Peace!!!"


Pure beauty..{looks like some Korean Actress,
"Kim Berry"}

*I pray everyday that you are the Sunshine, well,happy and in best of moods*

How to eat a Kit Kat

One of the many things that i miss seeing her do... she goes into a whole new different mood when she sees a Kit Kat.

Behold "Kit Kat" (Tadaaaaaaaa!)

Firstly you obtain/grab it from whoever who has it, must put on the super-innocent face while doing that in hope they wont notice.


Secondly celebrate the success of getting it ~happiness~
{Important to put on the best smile so that the person you grab it from wouldn't mind you taking/grabbing it}


Then, unwrap the white outer wrap of the packaging.



Next, with CARE tear a section of the inner aluminum wrapping.



Notice the amount of concentration.


Moving on, we come to the most vital part of breaking the section off {break & rip off}



Applying just the right amount of sheer stress to break it and rip it off.



Mission accomplished!

~Cheekily give away the one section to the person you got it from and store the rest away for to be enjoyed alone later~






Wait... final and last step.
Happily study away assuming no one knows about the other portion of Kit Kit that you have stored away. Conversation going on in her head "Yeah! got Kit Kat all to myself to enjoy later MUA HA HA HA "

~Miss you baby~

In tenebras

What is darkness?
Is it the feeling when we hit the deepest pit?
Does it have a name?
This cruelty, this hatred. How did it find the way into our life?
Should we seek it and embrace it?
We always seek for the light that comes rushing through.
But when did we lose our way?
Consumed by the shadows, swallowed whole by the darkness.
Does this darkness have a name?
Is it your name?

Pale and sickly in the pictures, like I'm dying of a terminal illness >.<

I look pale and sickly in the pictures, like I'm dying of a terminal illness >.< ????

Our last dinner... for now :)

For our last dinner together,

we decided to head off to a nice place in Taman Tun

called Porto Romano :)

We started off with...

 

...Sauteed Calamari Rings as an appetizer :)

Ju was already eyeing it the moment it arrived, haha!

then he innocently invaded it :D

next up was the Mediterranean Pizza...

... sundried tomatoes, turkey ham, onions, mushrooms, oodles of cheese on a thin crust... mmmm.

Moving on to the Risotto al Funghi, which is my all time favourite :)

... doesnt look like much, but tastes fantastic :)))

Buttery and cheesy with truckloads of mushrooms... yum!

A happy Ju with our food :)

*he actually cannot wait to dig in*

Lastly, we ended our meal on a sweet note with tiramisu...

yes, there's a big empty portion because *someone* couldnt wait for me to snap a pic first -.-

tu, caught red-handed! haha :D

that concludes a wonderful dinner :) thanks sweetheart!

*there are no pictures of me because I didnt sleep well the past few nights and so I look pale and sickly in the pictures, like I'm dying of a terminal illness >.<*

My farewell gathering...

so today i had my farewell gathering...

invited all those closest to me, family and friends included :)

lots of yummy food available...

just a small gathering of about 70 people...

even some of Ju's friends came :) thanks guys!

invited some Lions and Leos :)

some family friends...

 

my hottie of a cousin ;)

and some old friends from primary school :p

thanks to all of you who made it!

you guys really made my day. glad to see u all one last time before i leave :)

lotsa love <3

~My Sunshine~

Introducing my Sunshine.....

These pics tells you all about her

























~ This is why shes my sunshine. The only one ~